People Are Still Good

In a world that can sometimes feel heavy with the weight of bad news, it’s easy to lose sight of the goodness that still exists. But over the past five years, as Tanner and I have walked this cancer road, we’ve been reminded again and again that there is so much good in the world—so many beautiful, selfless people who still show up in ways that restore your faith in humanity.

There’s a line in one of Luke Bryan’s songs that says, “I believe most people are good.” This song has stuck with me. This phrase is my reminder of hope, especially in times when the darkness of cancer feels all-consuming. Because when you experience this level of kindness, this overwhelming love, you truly do start to believe that most people, at their core, are good.From the moment Tanner’s diagnosis turned our world upside down, we were surrounded by goodness.

Just two days into this news, my dear friend started a GoFundMe to help us cover the financial burdens of Tanner being out of work. That first year felt impossible, but the support we received from so many—donations, prayers, words of encouragement—gave us the strength to keep going. I could stay home and care for Tanner without the crushing fear of financial uncertainty because of people’s generosity.

But it wasn’t just about the money. It was about everything else. People brought us meals, showing us how much they cared when we were just too tired to cook, which was almost daily. Family and friends took care of the small but vital things—cleaning our home when it felt impossible to keep up, painting the walls to give us a fresh start, and running errands like oil changes for the car. Simple tasks, but to us, they were monumental acts of love.

Our IVF auction, born out of a need to fund our wish for family while Tanner was still here. This auction was supported by hundreds of businesses and individuals who believed in our dream of bringing a child into this world despite the storm we were facing. From a year of Crumbl, to cinnamon rolls, to a puppy, and a trip to Alaska, so much was donated to help us reach our goal.

And that wasn’t the only crowdfunded blessing. Our daughter’s registry was supported by so many, from all over the world, who gave us the chance to welcome her into a world where kindness and love are alive.

Monetary donations have come through over the years, but so much more than that has made the difference to us. During my Masters program, my amazing grad school cohort—those friends who became family—rallied around me when I thought I couldn’t keep going. They helped me make it through a program I thought was impossible to finish while quite literally juggling everything else.

During my program there was a time when Tanner was in the hospital for 8 months, we practically lived there. Neighbors and followers sent us Starbucks and Doordash gift cards, ensuring we were fed even on the days when we felt too drained to think about dinner. And then there were the countless people who sacrificed their time to be with Tanner so I could work, go to school, rest, or even just take a breath.Tanner was never alone if he didn’t want to be.

And in the most intimate and precious way, we had professionals offer their services as a gift. Followers that saw my exhaustion donating their talents to help me care for myself through something like a massage or facial. Photographers donating their services to help us capture every moment possible. A local company gave Tanner some IV infusions to support in his chemo recovery. A friend and fellow therapist donated her services as a death doula, helping us plan and process the unthinkable. Most recently a local photographer donated her photo and video services to capture the most beautiful moments of our daughters birth and moments with her daddy so we could always have those memories. When we came home from the hospital, a Doula business donated 10 nights of postpartum doula services. These nights given me the space to sleep, grieve and prepare for what’s to come. 

In addition to all the tangible support we’ve received, the power of prayer and positive thoughts has been another incredible source of strength. People from all walks of life—regardless of their faith or spiritual practice—have sent us notes of encouragement, lifted us in prayer, or kept us in their thoughts. The outpouring of love from individuals who may not even share our exact beliefs, but who have come together with the common goal of sending good energy our way, has been deeply moving. Knowing that so many are thinking of us, holding us in their hearts, and hoping for our strength has been a reminder that no matter where we are or what we’re going through, we’re never truly alone.

It’s so difficult to put into words EVERYTHING that has been done for us over the years. Just today I stopped at our PO box and felt love from a sweet 12 year old girl who made us some bracelets, a supporter who sent some of my favorite snacks to help me recover from postpartum, another who made babygirl a sweater and stuffy, and one other that made her some colon cancer awareness bows. Then on TIkTok a sweet lady made a video asking for people to follow and support us because, in her words, “we need to be Shay’s extended family and show up to AmyLou’s birthday parties.”

This journey has been hard. So hard. But in all the darkness, we have witnessed an outpouring of light that I can only describe as pure goodness. People have given in ways that can’t be measured—through their time, their resources, their hearts—and it has changed us. It has changed me. If nothing else, this journey has shown me that people will rise up in the hardest times

So if you’re ever questioning whether there’s goodness left in the world, I can tell you, there is. It is here, in the love of family and friends, in the kindness of strangers, and in the hearts of those who choose to show up and make a difference. We’ve felt it every single day. And I believe, with everything in me, that most people are good.